Dev’s Newsletter – Sep 2021

Aloneness / Loneliness

Okay, so I’m a week into my new “digital nomad” lifestyle try-out here in Kyiv, Ukraine. So far so good. I got all the little practical bits and bobs sorted out – local SIM, travelcard, gym membership. My working day is fine. Now it’s more about connecting with people, making new friends and doing some nice self-care. I’ve started learning the language, assisted by Udemy and Duolinga, and I’m determined to keep doing a bit each day. I know that I can exist in a foreign country and not bother but I want to not be like this. I’m getting there with the Cyrillic alphabet and am starting, scary stuff, to speak it to strangers!

I haven’t felt very lonely so far, though this is my biggest concern about this type of lifestyle. Or rather, not feeling lonely but becoming locked up in my body, shutting off feeling. I’m booking some massage and making a point of sharing with people I know. It’s a lot about self-awareness and presence, I find. If I’m really present with myself then I can be in the moment, and alone, and happy. When that presence is lacking, then a sense of loneliness can itch away in the background, not fully acknowledged. I’m taking on the challenge of not having so many friendships physically on tap, and having to still get my needs met. 

Therapist work is still feeling great for me. My courses on Bioenergetics and Reichian Breathwork remain popular. I have clients for one to one online sessions, even though, because I work interventionist-style, I don’t deliberately seek long-term clients.

I’m starting on a new book, this time on Reichian Character Structure, which I feel is still seriously under-acknowledged and undervalued. More about that later on. I’ve also started experimenting with putting online courses onto other platforms. I have been pretty slack with getting that fully sorted out I have to admit. I have a tendency, if I’m honest, to make enough money to live the way I like, and then get lazy. Sometimes I think I need to push a bit harder!

It is an ongoing revelation to me just how liberating body-centred presence can be… and how hard at times I have to work for it. So I do stick with it. Every morning, I do 20 or so minutes of Bio and maybe some Reichian Breathwork. It gives me energy, positivity and resilience for the day. Certain long-term blocks I’m still carrying around bit-by-bit begin to shift. I have learned the need for discipline to keep going, ideally in an intelligent way. 

I hope wherever you are, you are both surviving and thriving. And more than this, that you are present with yourself whatever is going on around you. My aim is to do the same. Do feel free to drop me a line anytime you feel. 

With love

Devaraj 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *